Black Card
by SeraSearaSpin
Summary: They walk on different paths, their fate left to different threads. Six months after Aogiri, Kaneki and Hide sit down for a little chat.


**Trivia time! The title is a reference to Stephen King's book 11/22/63. There's a character who balances could-have-beens in his head (who isn't the main character, before you ask) and he carries a greenish-yellow card. His predecessor eventually went insane from the strain, his card went from green to yellow to red to black and he killed himself. The end.**

**This omits a couple details to make this make sense. I mean, the CCG know that Kaneki's been missing for 6 months, and I think Hide knows about the 10-day-torture session via shoecrophone. And Hide's a smart boy, he's probably put the pieces together...BUT WE'RE IGNORING THAT FOR THE SAKE OF THIS STORY K**

**It's kind of funny. Since the anime aired, the number of stories in this genre jumped from 6 to 52. A ton seemed to flood in during the half a month between this story's publication and 'Withered', which I think then was story number 18. Who knows, maybe far in the future when Tokyo Ghoul is an OP writing genre like Naruto or Hetalia, people will look back at this "legacy story" and laugh at everything I've gotten wrong. But until then, both Tokyo Ghoul stories I've written got a ton of attention even hours after I published it, so...**

**Anyway, you're not here to listen to me ramble about story science, you're here for the story. **

**Edit: Some thanks is in order for ZeronosVega, who quite helpfully gave me a few pointers on cleaning this up a little. ^u^**

**Finally, review! :D**

* * *

It had been a while since Kaneki was able to count even a few minutes of time as "spare". But now, it was a sunny day, unseasonably chilly for summer (who even knew what day it was anymore, time didn't matter). His sword and shield had both begged off a break, or he'd begged it off of them - this new self of his took some getting used to, digging through the streets to try and reinforce the safety of the race he was no longer a part of, or scraping through old history in the many wards to try and overturn even a little bit of information on Rize. The humanity he'd desperately been clinging to had failed him. His mother's voice was no longer in his head. The centipede had devoured it.

Now, instead of the voice of the obedient boy, the bookworm, screaming at the atrocities he committed on a regular basis, there was an empty space in the form of a smile.

However, a few things couldn't be scrapped.

His best friend, for one thing.

And that was how he found himself in a hair salon, temporary black dye being stroked into his snow-pale hair, and the hairdresser keeping up a friendly conversation. Next, he purchased a bottle of "skin-tone" nail polish, fumbling and blushing and inventing a girlfriend who really, absolutely _needed_ the polish, and the clerk laughed and waved him through after he made his purchase. He took a few minutes to coat his dark nails with it, hoped Hide would fall for his cheap disguise, and then he was outside, wearing a light jacket over one of his old shirts. The sheer _normalcy_ of everything disturbed him. He itched to return to this manner of living, this life, but it all felt fake and plastic, like over-sweetened fudge. The real world was the lift of a veil away.

Walking through the crowds of similarly-clad people, he reflected that at this point, everyone was indistinguishable. All were tucked up in jackets, easy and relaxed to enjoy the fair weather, hands in pockets. _None of them know how close they are to danger, here. __I walk among them, a wolf among sheep, and none of them know. _The gap was too far to bridge with mere words, but he tried anyway, all the novels stored and rotting in his disintegrating mind springing forth to assist him.

_Parallel words, no, _different_ worlds. A different universe compounded onto this one, peeking through a window and stepping through it. Where_ _did ghouls come from, anyway? An alternate universe is entirely likely. _He tripped over a woman's foot, and she barely spared him and his mumbled apology a glance. _They can go about their normal lives, and I know the horrors that lurk just out of sight. How do people pay no attention to this underworld? _

The thoughts were shaken out of his head as he reached the restaurant they'd be meeting at. It'd been - how long had it been? A month? Six? Since he'd seen his best friend, and it was clear he still hadn't changed his punctual ways. Indeed, Kaneki himself was late from his pit stop to draw himself back into the human world, and Hide was lounging in a chair just inside. Clouds were starting to billow over the sun as Kaneki pushed the door open, and he felt a stab of regret on noticing the way his friend's face lit up. _Certainly, I should try and talk to him more. It's been a long time. He likes my company, and I like his. _

"You've changed your hair!" was the first thing out of his mouth, and indeed, Hide had. Instead of its usual spiky style, it was longer, right down around his ears, and the orangey-blond color was slightly more muted.

"Funny that you say that, actually," Hide replied, the smile wrinkling up the skin around his eyes. "It seems that you've changed yours, too."

Kaneki slumped into the seat with a sigh. Any fear of awkwardness between them was gone. "It shows that much, huh?"

Hide reached forwards to flick a hanging strand. "Well, it never used to have this opaque tone. A fresh job since there's no roots showing, right?"

"You never miss a trick, do you?" Before Hide could ask him about it, he changed the subject. "So, what's new?"

Hide being his usual perceptive self, he noticed the abrupt topic change, but chose to keep it to himself. "Well, you'll never guess what happened."

"What?" Kaneki sat forward, eyes alight. "C'mon, don't keep me in suspense."

The blond laughed. "Well now that you mention it, we should probably make our order first...Waiter!" A young man hurried over to take their order. "Now, Kaneki, what do you want?"

The flustered ghoul batted feebly at the menu and skimmed the choices before admitting, "I'm not all that hungry, thanks-"

"Now, you surely can't be that eager to know my surprise?" Hide was talking in that voice that seemed as if it were about to break into laughter at any second, and it brought back fresh memories of just a year ago, school, Hide teasing, Kaneki reading, _(Nishiki turning to Hide and tackling him into an alleyway and gloating over his unconscious form)- _

"It's not that," said the newly dark-haired boy, scratching his neck self-consciously. "I'm just not hungry."

"Well that's unfair, to have you sit here and watch me eat. Two burgers!" Hide grinned up at the waiter, who noted their orders and took off for the kitchen. Kaneki voiced his protests. "Oi, I said I wasn't hungry, why'd you have to go and do that, now? _You_ eat it."

"Right, right, whatever," said Hide cheerily, keen eyes noticing his friend's obvious distaste when the food was served, as lightning fast as when they'd first discovered this place together. He bit into the burger, making exaggerated 'mmm' sounds while Kaneki looked away.

"Right, the food's served. Now, Hide, what's up?"

"I got a job with the CCG!" Hide exclaimed, practically glowing, and for once, his sharp senses glazed over the fact that his friend had gone pale.

"Y-you did?" Kaneki managed, shellshocked. An awkward silence started to rise between them, and he reached for cheerful words that weren't there. After an eternity of fumbling, he choked, "That's...great. It's great, Hide!" An almost maniac enthusiasm pumped into his body, and a wide grin stretched from ear to ear. "Really, it is!"

Hide looked up from his burger. "I'm glad you think so!" He beamed. "Really, though, it's only a part-time job, and I just went and carted around papers for everyone for a couple of months, but today," he said conspiratorially, leaning across the table, "I got promoted! I was being, well, not really interrogated, but questioned about why I joined, and it seemed like he was getting bored. The questioner, I mean. Then - and you'll never believe this - Amon Koutarou walked in!"

Seeing that Kaneki was confused, the blond felt the need to elaborate.

"You know, the one who's been working relentlessly on that "Binge Eater" case? You _must've_ seen him on the TV at least once." Kaneki slowly shook his head, and Hide sighed, exasperated, and rattled off more facts. "His partner was killed somewhat recently, an older man called Kureo Mado? Have you heard of him? You've probably seen him before, he's the hunchback with strange eyes and a lab coat. The circumstances around his death are funny, actually...apparently there was a sighting of a ghoul with a mask like teeth, working with that Rabbit ghoul that killed a few investigators back then. Eh, about...six months ago." It took all of Kaneki's willpower not to freeze at that. _A mask like teeth? Rabbit ghoul? That can only mean..._

While lost in his own thoughts, he missed the slowing of Hide's voice as he finished the sentence.

"...and now Amon works with Mado's daughter Akira, and she's a knockout." Hide looked starstruck for a moment, no doubt thinking of her, and with effort, Kaneki pulled himself back into the conversation and rolled his eyes.

"Hide, you care too much about women." It was a gleaming golden moment of normalcy. He savored it.

"Yeah, sure, but _this girl..._! She's got beautiful hair, gold, and she keeps it swooped up in this elegant bun or in this professional bob thing, and the most intense violet eyes. And a nice body, too... It's hard to believe she's related to the old man. You've got to see her to understand, anyway. And what about you and that girl from the coffee shop? Is that why you've been missing?" Hide leered at him, and Kaneki flushed. "Who? Touka? _No!_ No way! Are you insane?"

Then Hide laughed and took another bite of his burger. "Well, I was telling you about my job when we got distracted."

"Yeah, how much do you get paid?" Kaneki tried, and his friend merely laughed but didn't answer. "Anyway, Amon and Akira walk in, and the the strange man investigating me dismissed me and said something like "Now instead of being a part time worker, you're a part time investigator!" Hide bounced in his seat, drawing the attention of a few of the other restaurant patrons.

"It's like your childhood dreams have come true!" Kaneki enthused, and Hide continued on that trail, eyes sparkling. "Yeah! I've always wanted to be an investigator of sorts, and now I've got this beautiful perfect opportunity in front of me! Life is looking up!"

"Oh, undoubtedly," Kaneki replied, frozen inside. _Hide, too? Must I lose the people that are most important to me, in one way or another?_ Apparently not all of his humanity was gone, as he wanted to break down and cry. The expression on his face was stiff and wobbly.

_Different universes, you and I. _The old thoughts returned, a melancholy cloud hanging over his head. _Completely different worlds. You, in the world of my enemy. Would you still treat me like a human if you learned of this transformation? Wolf in sheep's clothing indeed. What sort of world is it where I can't even trust my best friend?_

"Oi, Kaneki. You're spacing out on me." Kaneki jerked his head up and pasted a smile onto his face. "Sorry, I'm a little tired. Long walk to get here. What's it like being an investigator?" he asked, cutting off something Hide was about to say.

With a slight shrug, Hide continued on his tangent. "Well, we haven't done much yet. I'm mostly granted access to more information than I had from scanning the news articles, and I also fetch food for them sometimes during lunch, when they're thinking too deeply to be bothered. Sometimes we're visited by Amon's associate...ah..." Hide snapped his fingers. "I can't remember his name. Well, we're visited by him and his decidedly strange second rank assistant. I've heard rumors that he once sucked out a man's eardrum." Hide shuddered. "Creepy."

"Maybe it's a kink?" suggested Kaneki, which sent his friend into gales of laughter.

"You've gotten funnier in your absence, Kaneki," said Hide, clapping a hand on his shoulder. "I've missed you." His gaze sharpened as the ghoul turned his eyes _(eye?)_ away. "I'm sorry, I've been busy," he mumbled.

"It's ironic, actually," Hide said, and now his tone was no longer so light. "While looking into a lead on the binge eater case, your name came up." Kaneki tensed up, and under the friendly hand still on his shoulder, the blond noticed. "I-it did? How so?" Kaneki tried not to sound as shaky as he felt, and thought he failed miserably.

"Well, it seems you got in your accident around the time the binge eater disappeared. And there was that girl you were interested in, right?"

Kaneki nodded, subdued. _Rize. _

"When her organs were transplanted into you, you remember that fuss in the news, how they hadn't gotten permission, etc. They then mentioned that you'd been missing for six months. Six months, Kaneki. That's not a short time."

There was a pause as the blond took a breath. "They asked me about you."

"W-what did you say?"

Hide shrugged, feigning obliviousness to his friend's certain uncomfortability. "Not much. That you were my best friend, and I hadn't seen you in ages. Where've you been?"

"Around," said Kaneki vaguely, and the wall of awkwardness was rising again.

_Different worlds. This line that separates us is growing too wide, and soon, risking my life to spend time with him won't have any gain. It's a fruitless effort. Why did I even come here? I'm endangering myself, endangering Hide. This is not how I want to live. _

"Oh."

More silence. Hide finished his burger and pushed the other towards Kaneki. "Eat. You're tired, and you can't just live on coffee."

"Not that tired," Kaneki said hastily. "But not hungry, either. Truly, I'm fine. And you normally like this place's cooking."

_We're on different planets, you and I._

"Oh, I insist," said Hide, pushing it towards him again, almost maliciously. "Sometimes it feels better to watch others eat."

_You feast on the delicacies that the human mind can create, and I'm reduced to devouring only meat. Perhaps Tsukiyama has the right idea, taking the best cuts and styling them so perfectly that one almost feels whole. _

With his friend's eyes on him the whole time, there was no way he could squeeze out of this mess. Bracing his throat, he lifted the burger to his lips, tore a chunk with his teeth. It felt slimy and disgusting on his tongue, reeking of cows and their poop and agriculture. The bread was no better, mashed into a glistening pulp, absolutely stiff with the taste of warm earth and the parasites that lived in the roots. Only by sheer force of will was he able to force it down. Sweat broke out on his forehead, but he remembered the manager's words; _Swallow it quickly, and chew several times after. Especially be sure to say that it's good; that lowers people's guard. _

_Different threads. Different walks of life, nothing between us can be as it was. We're balancing on different strings. _He pictured an enormous guitar with infinite strings, a different person balanced on each, and ghostly hands strumming out the fate of the universe in threads of music. It was a sort of poetic image, but one that only highlighted the differences in the lives he and Hide led. _How terrible, to be separated by a barrier none of us could push down without great fear of invoking the wrath of one side or the other._

_Kimi and Nishiki have managed, but Hide and I are not like that. It's a different sort of situation, me and my best friend._

"It's good," said Kaneki weakly, and then with more strength; "There, I ate some. You can have the rest." Before this scene could get any worse, he glanced at his watch and gasped a little too dramatically. "Oh, damn, I've got to go; I'm going to be late. Here, you can take the bill this time, right?" Kaneki escaped from his chair without further incident, stepping quickly into the cool summer.

The overcast day had devolved into a rainy one, and the ghoul, unprepared for the sudden shift, was left without an umbrella. Water pattered dowen onto his head, and even then, streaks of dye were starting to drip out of his hair.

_It really must've been a cheap job..._When Hide looked closely, he noticed that after a few steps his friend was joined by a strong, tall man with an interesting beard (and an umbrella), and a block later by an elegant man in a blindingly orange suit, and then he was out of sight.

Hide stayed and poked at Kaneki's burger. Saliva still glistened from where he'd taken the bite out of it, and at the position of the CCG he currently held, he could certainly afford to bring it in and get that little bit of DNA tested for high Rc cell amounts. "Kaneki, you shouldn't be keeping secrets from me," he said softly, and rose to his feet, his head full of questions.

When he walked out, he tossed the unfinished burger into the trash.


End file.
